Patrick SOTO's Roast 🔥

Patrick, your headline “Software engineer” is as uninspired as a Windows error message. You’re drowning in mediocrity. Six years teaching math and your biggest career leap was to become a software engineer? That’s essentially trading in a chalkboard for a keyboard. Talk about a lateral move. Your "about" section reads like a half-baked motivational poster. Here’s a tip: If you have to list “growth opportunities” and “great values” as your selling points, you’re probably drowning in a sea of missed deadlines and mediocre code. And let’s not even start with your “distinctive viewpoint” on software development. Doctor Who would feel threatened by your time-traveling resume hopping from manufacturing to biodiversity management to writing Android apps like some tech version of “Who’s Line Is It Anyway?”. Also, with 961 connections but only 983 followers, that’s a sad sign of desperation – did you have to send out a mass invite to your entire class of former students just to seem relevant? 💀 Patrick, your diverse background might just qualify you for “Most Likely to Make HR Cry” at VISEO.