Most LinkedIn DMs get ignored. Here's why.
Open your LinkedIn inbox right now. Count how many unread messages are pitches from strangers. Connection requests followed immediately by a sales message. "I'd love to pick your brain" with no context. Copy-paste templates that start with "I noticed your impressive profile."
This is why people hate LinkedIn DMs. Not because messaging is bad, but because most people do it badly.
The good news: when done right, LinkedIn DMs are one of the most effective networking tools available. A single well-written message can start a conversation that leads to a client, a collaboration, or a career opportunity. The bar is low because everyone else is sending garbage.
The messages people actually respond to
Before we get into tactics, here's the principle: a good DM gives before it asks.
People respond to messages that make them feel valued, not targeted. The difference between a message that gets a reply and one that gets ignored usually comes down to three things: relevance, personalization, and intent.
Rule 1: Don't pitch in the first message. Ever.
The number one mistake on LinkedIn: connecting with someone and immediately sending a sales pitch. It doesn't matter how good your product is. It doesn't matter how well you wrote the pitch. The relationship hasn't earned it yet.
Think of it like a real-life networking event. You wouldn't walk up to a stranger, shake their hand, and immediately start selling. You'd have a conversation first. You'd find common ground. You'd build some rapport.
LinkedIn DMs work the same way. The first message should start a conversation, not close a sale.
Rule 2: Reference something specific
Generic messages get generic responses (or no response at all). "I'd love to connect and explore synergies" tells the other person nothing about why you specifically want to talk to them specifically.
Instead, reference something real:
Their content: "Your post about reducing onboarding time from 3 weeks to 5 days was really practical. We're dealing with the same challenge right now."
Their work: "I saw the product launch you led at [Company]. The approach to user onboarding is interesting, especially the interactive walkthrough."
A shared connection or experience: "We both attended [Event] last month. Your panel on content marketing raised a question I've been thinking about."
Specificity proves you're a real person who did real research, not a bot running a sequence.
Rule 3: Make it short
Nobody wants to read a 500-word DM from a stranger. Keep your first message under 3 to 4 sentences. That's it.
A good structure:
One sentence of context (why you're reaching out). One sentence of value or specificity (what caught your attention). One sentence with a low-commitment ask (a question, not a meeting request).
Example:
"Hey [Name], I read your post about moving from Salesforce to HubSpot. We're evaluating the same switch right now and your point about data migration timelines was really helpful. Quick question: did you run both systems in parallel during the transition, or did you do a hard cutover?"
This works because it's short, specific, and asks something easy to answer. No pitch. No pressure.
Rule 4: Earn the right to ask for time
Don't ask for a 30-minute call in your first message. You haven't earned that yet. A stranger's time is valuable, and asking for it before building any rapport is presumptuous.
Instead, start with small asks:
A quick question they can answer in 2 sentences. Their opinion on a specific topic. Feedback on something relevant to their expertise.
Once you've exchanged a few messages and built some rapport, then you can suggest a call. By that point, it feels natural instead of pushy.
Rule 5: Follow up (once)
People are busy. A message that goes unanswered doesn't always mean "not interested." It often means "I saw this, meant to reply, and forgot."
One follow-up after 5 to 7 days is fine. Keep it casual: "Hey [Name], just bumping this in case it got buried. No worries if the timing isn't right."
More than one follow-up crosses into annoying territory. If they don't respond after two messages, move on.
What to do before you DM someone
The best DMs don't come out of nowhere. They come after you've already built some familiarity. Here's the warm-up:
Week 1 to 2: Comment on their posts. Not "great post" but actual thoughtful comments that add value. Do this 2 to 3 times.
Week 2 to 3: They start recognizing your name. They might like or reply to your comments. You're no longer a stranger.
Week 3+: Now send the DM. Reference a recent post or conversation. The message feels like a natural next step, not a cold pitch.
This approach takes longer. It also works dramatically better.
Templates that work (use as starting points, not copy-paste)
For building a genuine connection:
"Hi [Name], I've been following your posts about [topic] for a few weeks. Your perspective on [specific point] really changed how I think about [related thing]. Curious: is that something you figured out through trial and error, or was there a specific moment that shifted your thinking?"
For asking for advice:
"Hey [Name], I noticed you made the transition from [role A] to [role B] about a year ago. I'm considering a similar move and would love to hear what surprised you most about the switch. No pressure for a long answer, even a sentence or two would help."
For potential collaboration:
"Hi [Name], your work on [specific project] caught my attention. We're building something in a similar space and I think there might be an interesting overlap. Would you be open to a quick chat to see if there's a way we could help each other?"
Use MyFeedIn to warm up your outreach
The warm-up strategy (commenting before DMing) only works if you can consistently find the right people's posts. LinkedIn's algorithm doesn't make this easy.
MyFeedIn solves this. Create a custom feed of people you want to build relationships with. See their posts every day. Comment regularly. Build familiarity. Then, when you send that DM, you're not a stranger. You're someone they already recognize.
The best DMs don't start in the inbox. They start in the comments.